GPS vs Human

I was outside earlier this evening, attaching some rubber anti-slip treads to our wooden front steps so we don’t kill ourselves the next time it’s icy, when an SUV pulled up to the curb. The conversation went something like this:

Passenger: “Hey, do you know where the Maine Mall is? We’re driving in circles!“

Me: ”Sure. Actually the easiest way to get there is to go back to the bottom of the hill, take a right and then your next left...“

Passenger, pointing uphill and interrupting: ”But the thing says to go this way and take a left!“

Me, seeing the GPS unit on their dashboard: ”Yes, you can get to the Mall that way too, but it’s more complicated and it’ll take you longer.“

Passenger: ”Do you know where Maine Mall Donuts is?“

Me: ”No, but I can tell you how to get to the Mall.“

Passenger: ”What street is the Maine Mall on?“

Me: ”Maine Mall Road.“

Passenger, yelling at the driver who might have been his son: ”Reset that thing, will you?“ To me: ”It says we’re supposed to go this way. Where is Stevens Ave?“

Me: ”If you stay on this street, it’ll run right into Stevens.“

Passenger: ”But it says to turn left! Listen, we’ll just do what it says and take our chances. Thanks.“

And away they went. If you’re not going to trust the locals, why bother to ask them for directions? Heck, I would have drawn them a map if they hadn’t been in such a hurry.

On the other hand, Maine is one of the places where natives reputedly tell tourists things like ”You can’t get theah from heah...“ And in thinking about the tone of the conversation, I don’t really think they wanted me to give them directions. More like they wanted me to reassure them that the GPS unit’s directions were okay. So probably when I told them to turn around and head back the direction they’d just come from, it made me appear unreliable.

But not as unreliable as our front steps. Last Saturday it rained all day and then the temperature dropped right down to 32 degrees overnight. The next morning our front and side steps were slick as seaweed and I made a quick decision to find some sort of treads to put on them before winter sets in for real. So now the treads are screwed in place and I’m ready.

Footnote: My son googled ”Maine Mall Donuts“ and it does exist—on the Maine Mall Road, too.